A full insight on my life, my views, my poetry and anything random that comes to mind...l I talk about it all!
Friday, October 18, 2013
It Does Get Better
They always say when you love some one you you should let them and if its meant to be well then they'd find their way back into your life, but how true is that? My philosophy is this: "When you love someone, fight for what you feel. But if the one you love, loves someone else, LET GO. Be like a soldier, know when to fight and when to surrender." Everything has a way of working it's self out and I strongly believe that if it's meant to be it will be just don't do anything outrageous. Not everyone that comes in your life is meant to stay no matter how in love they say they are with you or how in love you think you are with them. Some are just here to teach us all a lesson about ourselves and show us how strong we can be when they break our hearts... Sometimes we need a broken heart, sometimes we need to fall for jerks, bitches and douche bags and sometimes they need to treat us like crap so that we'll know how to appreciate out Prince Charming and Princesses when they finally come along. Life has a lot of lessons that it wants to teach us and I admit, those lesson aren't always fun and they don't always leave us smiling... Some of them send us spiraling into depression, have us up all hours of the night crying into our pillows and wishing we were dead cause the pain of a broken heart is just too much to take. We've all had to go through it at one point in our lives or the other. Everybody knows what pain feels like, we've all had our hearts broken by the one person we never thought in a million years would hurt us. It's a natural part of life. Without sadness there can be no joy, without tears, there can be no laughter, these things work together as one and we need to experience the bad to fully appreciate the good that life has to offer and that my friend is what you call the #YingYangEffect... everything in this world exists with its opposite, so if you find yourself crying for a week straight, look forward to a week of pure happiness and laughter... Pain isn't forever.
Animal Session
| Dolphins |
| Chinchilla |
| Great White Shark |
| Monkey |
| Liger |
| Tiger |
Pumps Malfunction
So I made a pretty bold attempt to wear these sexy pair of hot pumps one day... I wasn't even looking at the size of the heel man the shoes just called me and I proudly answered the call like a boss, plus it wasn't my money getting burned so it made the whole thing even better... now am talking bout a $3,800 dollar shoes, black suede and all the hotness points one could ever dream of!! I didn't even care that it was a size bigger than I had originally wanted. I'm a size 7 and the shoes were a 8 but I could not leave that store without them, particularly because the other pair of shoes that I had originally wanted had severe malfunction issues and I needed a new pair of shoes for an event I was to attend. Now here I am admiring the shoes from all angles, dying to just shove my foot all up in that piece and test drive that sucker before I made my decision final even though I had already made up my mind that it was coming home with me no matter the cause of it. So here I am in the shoe store, with ma new pumps on, feeling confident and all got my swag on full volume feeling great... purchased it and then left the store with a big stinking smile on my face feeling like i'm queen of the world dying for the next day to go strut my stuff at the event... Finally the big day arrived and as I got dolled up and maked up and the full nine yards, I put the shoes on to go out and make a statement in front of all my friends that was waiting on me... and this is the fate that befell me: Can you say embarrassed!!
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Single?
Now there are a lot of benefits to being single and i'm learning that now. I've been single for 4 days now which for me.... well that's the longest I've ever been single since I started dating and I must admit it is kinda fun! One of the best things about being single, you don't have to worry about anyone's feelings but your own. There's this level of freedom and total oneness, plus you can flirt as much as you want without anyone getting upset with you, well you can until the other person wants to take a little further and you shoot them down but that should be the least of your worries :). I must admit, I do kinda miss the whole bf/gf status but i'm just not ready to go there again, this is the year of me... as said by my best friend Chanice... She and I are kinda going through similar situations its fun knowing i'm not alone, she really understands me better than anyone really and I love that! My single life is actually not as bad as I thought it would be, it's actually really really really fun, though I haven't started the whole flirting phase of it all yet so you can just imagine when that ball gets to rolling!! For all of you guys out there who are complaining about how you hate being single and how being single sucks... Y'all are living the single life really wrong!!! A relationship takes a lot of time and patience and understanding and I have none of those, well I do... just not a lot of it so in this year of getting to know myself i'm going to work on my people skills.. A guy can be my best friend for years on top of years but as soon as the whole gf/bf bomb gets dropped its like I instantly go in defense mode and that's when everything goes south and its with that that I know I need this time off, else am looking to spend forever alone with 27 stinking cats.... and I hate cats. Being by yourself is not a bad thing people, in fact it actually shows you how strong you are knowing you have no one but yourself to rely on... So be single and rock it out!! there's plenty of time for love and togetherness an marriage and when all of that happen you can just kiss "alone time" goodbye worst when the kids get involved... Still think being single is a bad thing?? #ThinkAboutIt
Relationships
Now no one said these lil nightmares would be very easy to deal with, honestly they are probably the hardest things we'll ever have to do in all our lives. Some may ask is there ever a way to fully prepare yourself for a relationship? my best answer, hell no! You can't study for a relationship and no matter how well you think you may know your significant other they will always find some way or the other to surprise you. Now in all fairness, we are all different and to be able to even try and attempt to be with someone, you have to first know how to survive by yourself; learn how to rely solely on yourself and learn to love yourself unconditionally before you can say you love someone else. If you cant love yourself yourself first, your relationship will suffer greatly. Also, never jump from one relationship to the next... That is one lesson I had to learn the hard way. You see when you do that, you then enter into that new relationship with all the problems you had carrying from the previous one and before you know it, you're taking out all your problems on this poor soul that did you no wrong, in fact all they tried to do was love you and make you happy.... but the hurt that you've been bottling up, well it kinda blinds you and you start to react negatively because you're confused by all that you are feeling. Your emotions have a funny way of bringing you to places you never thought possible and that can be scary. I've always though that everyone else was the problem, they just didn't understand me but after a while I've come to the realization that I was my own worst enemy, the only one standing in the way of my own happiness all because of pains from the past that hadn't let go of and because of that all my relationships suffered because all my barriers go up instantly, trying to keep me safe from getting hurt again... And though it does work, it always helps in keeping everyone else out. So you see, there are many factors that could prevent you from having that fairy-tale relationship that we've all grown up dreaming about... Go through detox, take a time out from relationships to fully reconnect with yourself, trust me when i say, you'll be surprised at how much you come to learn about yourself and I guarantee when you finally heal, the next relationship that you find yourself will be a solid 98% perfection.... No one is perfect after all :)
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